Peek behind the curtain at the inner workings of a mental health storytelling organization and this podcast with Laura Farrell and Gabe Nathan.
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Anxiety & Trauma Poems
Faced with trauma and grief, writer Laura Farrell turned to poetry to process her experiences.
A Psychologist Helps You Retrain Your Brain
Laura Farrell reviews Seth Gillihan’s book, Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks, an interactive guide to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
Episode 1 – Trauma, EMDR Therapy, and Asperger’s Syndrome
In the first episode of OC87 Recovery Diaries on the Radio, join Laura Farrell and Bud Clayman as they interview each other about their own mental health journeys.
Mental Health > Art
Is art more important than mental health? Laura Farrell shares her own mental health art and says that mental wellness is more important than creating art.
Childhood Trauma and Abandonment: My Long BPD Path to Recovery
From abandonment and shame to diagnosis and healing, Lisa’s story reveals the lifelong impact of trauma—and the courage to stop abandoning herself.
Why Do You Do That: My Journey with OCD
Follow Rosie’s candid personal essay on living with OCD, exploring compulsions, control, perfectionism, and the quiet question that changed everything: “Why do you do that?”
Podcasts
Our PodcastsWelcome to Recovery Diaries in Depth; a mental health podcast that creates a warm, empathic, and engaging space for discussions around mental health, empowerment, and change. Executive Director and podcast host Gabe Nathan brings a unique combination of...
The Little Girl Inside of Me: The Importance of Reparenting Your Inner Child
This mental health recovery story focuses on Morrene, whose healing journey led her to understand the inner child that still lives in her and reparent herself.
Our Team
Bud Clayman was the creative driving force behind Recovery Diaries. The website is an outgrowth of the autobiographical documentary film, OC87: The Obsessive Compulsive, Major Depression, Bipolar, Asperger’s Movie. Bud created, co-directed (along with Glenn Holsten...
The Ambition of Recovery: Surviving Gun Violence, a Story of PTSD
This mental health recovery story focuses on Silas, who has survived gun violence. Through the pain of violence, Silas has found healing and continued growth. Read here to learn more!
Learning Boundaries: A Story of Childhood Trauma and Abuse
This mental health recovery story focuses on Jasmin’s childhood trauma and abuse. She eventually shared her story and began to heal.
I Now Sing the Songs Life Wants to Hear
This mental health recovery story focuses on Levi’s struggle with suicidality. As he learned to face this part of himself through the love of his family, he found a way to heal.
Lifting The Weight Off My Shoulders: How My Personal Trainer Helped Treat My Mental Illness
This mental health recovery story focuses on Jennifer’s ongoing struggle with Bipolar disorder. As she learned to build structure in her life, her diagnosis too became more manageable. Read her story here!
My Very Own Sunshine: Healing from Trauma with Horses
This mental health recovery story focuses on Morrene, who learned to heal her childhood trauma by riding horses. Through horseback riding, Morrene learned to manage her PTSD and heal.
Waking Up Bipolar: Finding the Right Diagnosis to Begin Healing
by Listen to Executive Director Gabriel Nathan read this post aloud: Today, I am going to share with you my greatest memory, one I live with every day. As a child, I was one of those...
Dopamine, Disability & The Hedonic Treadmill
This mental health recovery story focuses on Cassandra who had a serious accident that left her paralyzed. The accident caused Cassandra to face her life and mental health in a new way. Read more to learn about her journey.
Yikes! Company—And My OCD—Are Coming!
This mental health recovery story focuses on Theresa who has managed OCD symptoms since childhood. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing, through OCD and healing.
The Price of Freedom: Living With Borderline Personality Disorder
This mental health recovery story focuses on Jaclyn who remained misdiagnosed and misunderstood for years. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing, through trauma, addiction and BPD.
The Moment Everything Clicked: A Story of Unhealed Childhood Trauma
Makayla Hutchison experienced childhood trauma and abuse that has had long-term effects on her mental health.
What Five Weeks in a Psychiatric Ward Had to Teach Me
This mental health recovery story focuses on Leif and an experience of psychosis due to a medication change. His mental health shifted and a hospitalization occurred. Read more to learn about his journey with mental health and healing.
Depression, Anxiety and Chronic Mom Guilt: How I Learned my Bipolar Diagnosis
This mental health recovery story focuses on Nadia and her diagnosis process around bipolar. Her mental health plummeted after the birth of her daughter. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing.
How I Cope with the Challenges of Bipolar Disorder
This mental health recovery story focuses on Dancan, who lives with bipolar. He has been unable to receive medication due to the healthcare system within his country. Read more to learn about his journey with mental health and healing.
Breaking Like Glass: A Story of Complex Trauma and Healing
This mental health recovery story focuses on Kiersten, who lives with C-PTSD. Her journey has been one around managing her patterns of activation and learning mechanisms to help her cope with hypervigilance and trauma response. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing.
Cultivating Mental Health Self-Awareness with Generalized Anxiety Disorder Recovery
This mental health recovery story focuses on Yasmina, who lives with generalized anxiety disorder. Her journey has been one around managing her patterns of activation and learning mechanisms to help her cope. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing.
Challenges in Dealing with and Recovering from Bipolar Disorder
This mental health recovery story focuses on Maria, who lives with bipolar disorder. Her journey has been one around managing her shifting moods and building coping mechanisms. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing.
Individuating to Find Peace in my Relationship with My Parents
This mental health recovery story focuses on Aditi, who lives with bipolar disorder. Her journey has been one around finding ways to act for herself and not others. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing.
The Importance of Drawing Boundaries, or, “I Leave at Nine”
This mental health recovery story focuses on Sheila, who lives with bipolar disorder. Her journey has been one around finding ways to advocate for her needs. Read more to learn about her journey with mental health and healing.
Managing Suicidality: How I Have Survived all my Hardest Days
This mental health recovery story focuses on Val, who has experienced suicidality and eventually was diagnosed with BPD and Bipolar. Read more to learn about her journey with psychosis and healing.
Crossing Borders to Confront my Bipolar Disorder
This mental health recovery story focuses on Jenny, who has experienced suicidality, when eventually hospitalized she was faced with a new diagnosis. Read more to learn about her journey with psychosis and healing.
How Throwing Out the Script to My Sleep Routine Helped Cure My Insomnia
This mental health recovery story focuses on Lauren, who was overwhelmed by life and all its challenges fell into patterns of insomnia and anxiety. Read more to learn about her journey.
One of These Things is Not Like the Others: My Surprising OCD Diagnosis and How It’s Helped Me Heal
This mental health recovery story focuses on Jenny, who was overwhelmed by life and teaching the pandemic, began therapy and discovered she has been living with OCD. Read more to learn about her journey.
Is There Life After Diagnosis: Finding Myself after Learning I Have Bipolar
This mental health recovery story focuses on Alexis’s journey with bipolar and how she learned to manage her mental health without making it who she is entirely.
Family Emergency Prompts OCD Coping Skills
This mental health recovery story focuses on Marilyn’s journey with OCD during a family emergency. Marilyn was able to establish coping mechanisms that helped her to heal, read more here!
Victory Over Suicidal Tendencies: Fostering the Human Connection
This mental health recovery story focuses on Amy’s journey with intergenerational trauma, suicidality and addiction. Amy eventually found support that helped her to heal, read more here!
Was I the Black Sheep? Discovering, Understanding and Healing my Trauma and CPTSD
This mental health recovery story focuses on Ana’s journey with Complex PTSD, and intergenerational trauma. Ana eventually cut ties with family to begin her healing journey. Read to learn more about how Ana learned to ask for help and recover from trauma.
Losing Her Saved Me: How I Healed From Trauma
This mental health recovery story focuses on Amanda’s journey with OCD, Anorexia, Complex PTSD, trauma and grooming. Amanda had to cut off her mother in order to heal. Read to learn more about how Amanda learned to ask for help and recover from trauma.
Excuse Me While I Obsess: Learning to Manage my Lifelong Struggle with OCD
This mental health recovery story focuses on Manndi’s journey with OCD. Manndi always struggled with symptoms but when she suffered from a miscarriage her OCD tendencies spiraled out of control. Read to learn more about how Manndi learned to ask for help and recover.
We’ll Leave The Gaslight on For You
This mental health recovery story focuses on Lindsey’s journey through abuse and childhood trauma, gaslighting, and hospitalizations, where Lindsey learned to trust her intuition and find practices around caring for herself. Read more in this mental health essay!
Life Has Become Wonderful: My Life with Schizoaffective Disorder (PART 2 OF 2)
This mental health recovery story focuses on Leif’s journey through hospitals, homelessness, and diagnosis. Leif learned to advocate for himself and now finds ways to do so for others. Read more in this two-part essay!
Life Has Become Wonderful: My Life with Schizoaffective Disorder (PART 1 OF 2)
This mental health recovery story focuses on Leif’s journey through hospitals, homelessness, and diagnosis. Leif learned to advocate for himself and now finds ways to do so for others. Read more in this two-part essay!
Learning to Prioritize Mental Health and Self-Care through a Traumatic Experience
This mental health recovery story focuses on Andrea’s journey after an incident of unwanted touch in a public place. Andrea felt anger, confused, uncertain how to go on. Through mental health care and re-prioritizing her needs, read how Andrea learned to heal from her trauma.
Magical Thinking as Trauma Response: How I Created Safety through Imagination
Faced with traumas before unimagined, Laura turned to the tool of magical thinking to create safety after ongoing experiences of trauma.
Misunderstood, Misdiagnosed, Misled: My Story of Illness and Addiction
Christina faced issues with addiction and the law, due to underlying mental issues, eventually with the proper help and diagnosis she learned to tackle these issues.
Mind Games: Depression & Anxiety Gripped My Father; COVID Nearly Took Him Away
Khadija grew up with two hard-working, loving parents, it was later in life that she experienced the impact of her father’s depression.
Sanguine: Attempting to Control Everything through Disordered Eating
Kate’s eating disorder started with a desire to control her body and quickly spiraled into something else, learning to reconnect to her body, Kate found her way to healing.
How I Overcame My Social Anxiety by Becoming a Journalist
Victor’s social anxiety felt debilitating and out of control, until he found and embraced journalism, a new tool for managing these difficult emotions.
Where’s Mamma? One Woman’s Struggle with Postpartum Depression
Robin lived the “perfect life” and was excited to welcome her new baby boy, quickly after his birth Robin noticed a shift in how she felt. As her postpartum worsened, Robin did not know what to do and eventually sought help.
To Hell and Back, a Man’s Struggle with Suicidal Ideation
While hospitalized under the mental health act, Dominic found himself feeling hopeless and desperate to end his mental pain, read his story to learn how he moved through the pain and found hope again!
I Felt Safer in a Psychiatric Hospital During the Pandemic
The national fatigue and anxiety caused by the COVID-19 pandemic felt all too familiar to Jennifer, who is diagnosed with bipolar and has experienced mania.
The Gentler Lessons of a Bipolar Disorder Diagnosis
Shortly after her first hospitalization and diagnosis of bipolar, Jocelyn fell into a deep depression. While in the hospital, Jocelyn was guided by the beauty of an orchid, sitting on her window sill. Jocelyn found ways to find beauty day to day to help cope with depression and diagnosis, along with therapy and medication. Read more about her story!
When Disabled Womanhood Means Shrinking: How Diet Culture Affects the Bodies and Minds of Disabled Women
In middle school, Erica began to notice her weight and developed disordered thinking about her body in an attempt to control it. Through recovery, Erica learned that her need to control her body was in part to make her disability less noticeable to others.
My Story of PTSD: Fighting the World Against All Odds
Through a difficult childhood, Kate developed PTSD, slowly as Kate began to understand the effects of her father’s absence and mother’s discipline on her mental health she began to heal.
My Bipolar, BPD, OCD, Panic Disorder, Agoraphobic Life’s Journey; Thus Far
As a child, Brianna attempted to find ways to control the emotions and experiences that she did not feel in control of, how Brianna’s diagnosis and treatment helped her to understand her moods.
Winning My Ongoing Battle with Depression and Alcohol Abuse
During childhood, Joao had trouble finding friends he could trust, how Joao moved through experiences of bullying and self-doubt.
Re-parenting My Inner Child: My Journey of Healing from Childhood Neglect
In childhood, Amanda the constant fear of neglect and need, how Amanda moved through her upbringing and re-parented herself.
Are We Destined to Repeat the Family Cycle?
Growing up, Natalie struggled with her father’s alcoholism and manipulation, how Natalie worked through her relationship through therapy and writing.
Overcoming my Barriers to Borderline Personality Disorder Recovery
The voice of her borderline personality disorder told her not to get into recovery. She worried that no one would love her when she got better.
The Vital Mission of a Therapist Working with Marginalized and Disenfranchised Populations
Angelica Pinna-Perez, an intersectionally-oriented therapist, works with marginalized and disenfranchised folx to access culturally-competent, affordable treatment.
OC87 Recovery Diaries on the Radio
Like its parent website, Recovery Diaries, OC87 Recovery Diaries on the Radio provides a forum for thoughtful discussion of mental health issues and topics. Through audio interviews and commentary, the podcast brings light to the shadow that so frequently enshrouds...
Bulimia: Look into Her Greedy Eyes and Destroy Her!
Sonia’s intrusive thoughts about her body controlled her behavior; how Sonia regained control of her life through identifying her disorder and finding help.
Gaslighting is Not Just a Movie: Recovering from the Effects of PTSD, Depression and Anxiety
After leaving an abusive relationship, Felicia Darlington’s anxiety and hopelessness felt out of control. Her strong essay details how she found support and learned to be comfortable in motherhood.
How Becoming a Parent Forced Me to Deal with my Anxiety
Feeling anxious and depressed after the birth of her son, Katharine joined a support group and found help to understand what was going on in her body and her mind. Katharine found ways to understand her anxiety and become the parent she longed to be.
Manic MFA: How My Degree Almost Cost Me My Sanity
Trying to manage bipolar disorder and a MFA program, she was influenced by mania, anxiety dictated the pace of her life, and her marriage was in danger.
An Average Anorexia Story (Serious, there is no big surprise or plot twist)
As her body changed, Amanda lost track of who she was. Slowly, through recovery from anorexia, Amanda found a way to reconnect to herself and to her body.
Eight Miles Of Agony: Anxiety and Travel
I don’t know if I will ever be free of the panic attacks but I have hope that I will know how to cope. As of right now, I am taking things one day at a time, living my life and sharing my story so that others know that they are not alone.
My Fight Against Rape and PTSD in College
I fight for myself and those recovery from rape and PTSD. I still struggle, but I am not a victim. I am a survivor. I am not defined by what happened to me.
Eating Disorder Healing and Changing Our Narratives Around Them
This mental health recovery story focuses on Ziba’s journey through an eating disorder, that often felt invisible. Ziba felt unseen in her disordered habits around eating and misunderstood when she first shared that she made herself sick to doctors. As she learned more about her disease and found help herself, Ziba worked to dismantle stereotypes and bust stigma. Through therapy and group work Ziba was able to understand her disorder and reconnect to herself. Read more!
I Want to Live: Turning a Corner with Suicidal Ideation and Depression
This mental health recovery story focuses on Tina’s journey through a fixation on death, depression and suicidal ideation. Tina’s thoughts and actions felt out of control, guide by anxiety. Suicidal ideation was a constant in her life, how Tina sought help and learned that are her core, she wanted to live. Through therapy and a close encounter with death, Tina discovered her will to live. Read more about Tina’s journey!
I Suppressed Everything – A Story of Abuse and Bipolar
This mental recovery story focuses on Lisa’s journey of childhood trauma, abuse and eventually her diagnosis of bipolar. After years of physical, sexual and mental abuse, Lisa thought she had found stability, until her mania set in followed by severe depression. Lisa’s life felt like it was spinning out. Her physical, sexual and mental abuse dictated her life, her mania felt out of control, how Lisa came to terms with her diagnosis of bipolar and past trauma and found a way to heal. With time and therapy Lisa found ways to cope. Read more about Lisa’s journey!
Emptying My Head: Bipolar Depression, A Tale of Two People
This mental health recovery story focuses on Erica’s journey through an abusive childhood, a diagnosis of bipolar depression and the feeling of being misunderstood, by other and by herself. Her bipolar depression and anger left Erica confused, when she found therapy she was able to see what was beneath her rage and come through to the other side. Erica realized that her anger masked a deep sadness, as she worked with a counselor she found a way to explore her past and understand her present. Learn more about Erica’s journey!
The Kid’s Alright, or Close Enough; My Asperger’s Diagnosis
Rachael grew up with a feeling that she was different from others. She experienced anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder symptoms and had regular meltdowns. Eventually these things turned into a problem with substance abuse. Her inability to adapt to change and childhood anxiety created a barrier, how Rachael’s diagnosis of Asperger’s Syndrome in adulthood helped her to understand her past and gain a newfound stability. Once, Rachael could understand what was going in her mind, she was able to take back control of her life. Read more about Rachael’s story!
Combating OCD with Narrative Poetry
An OCD story from a young woman who writes about how narrative poetry is helping redirect her obsessive compulsive brain in a beautiful, inspiring way.
Horror, Oppression, Perfectionism, Epiphanies; My Story of Comorbid Resilience
I am what clinicians may refer to as “comorbid,” meaning I experience simultaneous disorders at once. With my history of diagnoses of major depressive, post-traumatic stress, panic, generalized anxiety, illness anxiety, body dysmorphic, and social anxiety disorders, I have had an overwhelming journey.
My Whirlwind Brain; Living with Bipolar Disorder, Depression, and Anxiety
I’m a thirty-seven-year-old woman who was diagnosed with bipolar, depression and anxiety at the age of twenty-two. As I look back on my life I can remember feeling anxious throughout my childhood. I grew up in a good home with loving parents, but my anxiety persisted.
Seeking Sanity Step by Step
My illness devastated me at age twenty when I was committed to a psychiatric hospital for sixty days and eventually diagnosed with bipolar disorder.
Now What?: Suicidality and Planning for an Uncertain Present
When I exhibited symptoms of C-PTSD and OCD, I was afraid and lost. I survived multiple major depressive episodes, all of them including suicidality.
A Clinician’s Journey from Complex Trauma to Thriving: Reflections on Abuse, C-PTSD and Reclamation
Sheri Heller’s new book, A Clinician’s Journey from Complex Trauma to Thriving, is a guide to healing with a keen awareness that no two paths are the same.
Acceptance: How One Friend Helped Me Get Help for Depression and Anxiety on my Own Terms
As I battle with depression, anxiety, and PTSD, it has always been far easier for me to support others with mental health struggles than to admit my own.
More Mental Health Accounts to Follow on Instagram
This installment of our mental health resources column highlights Instagram mental health from authors who have appeared on OC87 Recovery Diaries.
How I Recovered from a Disorder I Had Never Heard of – Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures
In my research, I found several articles about Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures. Doctors do not use the term pseudo-seizures anymore because it falsifies them and invalidates them. Pseudo is a prefix meaning “false” or “fake,” and the seizures I was having, while not epileptic, were anything but fake.
I’m Just Tired: When You Dismiss Depression
“I can’t explain where I’ve been, and though everyone wants to understand, it doesn’t mean they comprehend. They can’t grasp where I am.” – Kathryn Rose Wood
Review – Rock Steady: Brilliant Advice from my Bipolar Life
Ellen Forney has written a second graphic novel, Rock Steady: Brilliant Advice from my Bipolar Life, which leads the reader through her healing process.
Get Used to Life Without Me: A Dispassionate Road to Suicide with Depression
I crossed seamlessly from ambivalence and malaise into an area I’d never been before: actively planning suicide.
Playing Hide and Seek with a Demon: My Struggle with Anxiety
I don’t know when it started. It was not as though I suddenly woke up with a raging heartbeat and butterflies in my stomach, wishing I could run away from myself. It came in tiny bits of worry.
Walking the Border: The Delicate Dance of OCD and Borderline
Yes, I have been diagnosed with depression, OCD and borderline personality disorder. Yet, I am still a good person.
Addiction and Anxiety – My Poetic Recovery
Trapped between fear and anxiety, I would drink and use drugs to cover up my feelings. After years of living this way with several bad trips, blackouts and hospitalizations, I went into treatment.
Transcending the Pain of Schizoaffective Disorder
Schizoaffective bipolar type is a disease characterized by mood swings and depression, in addition to psychosis, delusions, and paranoia.
The Homeless Gospel Choir, Punk Rock, and My Mental Health Journey
I started writing songs about my feelings and sharing them with audiences throughout the country as a touring musician, under the name The Homeless Gospel Choir.
You Are Not Alone: Inside My OCD Brain
Therapists have told me that I use these repetitive behaviors as way to avoid facing my fears.
Episode 21 – A Talk with Psych Central Podcast Host, Gabe Howard
Podcast interview with PsychCentral.com podcast host, Gabe Howard, who suffers from bipolar disorder, but is in recovery.
Growing Pains with a PTSD Diagnosis
A memory, a word, a smell, an instance can take one back to the exact moment the trauma first spoke to them.
Challenges of Writing a Bipolar Book When You Have Bipolar
I have bipolar disorder and I’ve written a book about my experience living with bipolar disorder and depression.
Episode 20 – Psychologist Maury Joseph, PsyD: A Therapist with a Unique Approach
A podcast interview with psychologist Maury Joseph, PsyD. Maury is different from most psychologists in that he “gets out of the way of his patients.”
With Depression, Love Won’t Save Me
“I wrote the song “Becoming” about giving my mental health adequate attention and care, even while in a relationship.” — Emily Yacina
Episode 18 – Libby Parker; Changing the LGBTQ+ Mental Health Landscape
Mx. Libby Parker, MSS, LSW is an outpatient therapist and manager of Einstein Health Network’s PRIDE Program, which coordinates and supports various services designed to meet the unique needs of LGBTQ+ identified patients.
Episode 17– Bipolar Disorder, Family, and Love
The memoir “Gorilla and the Bird” discusses how bipolar disorder affects work, family, and relationships. Podcast interview with Zack and his mom, Cindy.
Becoming Your Own Best Friend for Your Mental Health
When it comes to mental health, how we can become our own best friend in 2018? Here’s what we came up with. Happy New Year to you, friend.
Anxiety, Depression, and Motherhood Mental Health
As I lie in bed, my thoughts spiral saying, “You’re a horrible mother. You’re a horrible writer. You’re a horrible person.”
Episode 14 – “The Hunting Ground”: Recovering from Sexual Assault – an Interview with Documentary Film Subject, Kamilah Willingham
Interview with Kamilah Willingham, a subject of the documentary film, “The Hunting Ground.”